plz talk dirty to me
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Randomize
