Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
and she was petting her beer can
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
