I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
