Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize