Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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