i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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