What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize