I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
