$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize