Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I need to sanitize my soul.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Randomize
