My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
