dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
