i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
