Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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