I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
