Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
