with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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