well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
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