Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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