Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Randomize
