omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
