He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
