dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
