we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Randomize
