I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
