i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
