Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
