why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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