Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
