why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
