Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
