Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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