We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
