i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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