the condom got lost in my hair
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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