She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I wear drunk well.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
