I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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