well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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