I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize