if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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