dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
