whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
