dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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