There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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