i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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