ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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