he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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