The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize