quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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