I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Let's get the cat blown out
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
