Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Just pee around me
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize